Comedy Central Salvaged Content
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"Ford vs. Chevy. Chevy strikes the first blow with the creation of the mordant moniker "Ford Rustang". But the Detroit underdog comes back harder with the dastardly drawing of Calvin urinating on the Chevy logo. Ford-First On Race Day!"

"Ha! Your noggin's filled with chicken liver. Marlboro vs. Camel, additive wars. Marlboro goes on the alphabetic attack, adding Megastigmatrienome and putting the heat on Camel. Camel responds by throwing in Lead with their tobacco. Camel Light indeed!"

"Ahh, your tongue's a dog's leg. Number one all time, Starbucks vs. The Gap. The Gap takes over 60% of American soil and wipes out half of the Starbucks offensive, only to see Starbucks rally and infiltrate the Gap front line, successfully opening up a Starbucks inside every Gap. Watch out, dirty Gapanese!"

"You got tumors on your cataracts. Best brainwashing bout, Tony Robbins vs. L. Ron Hubbard. L. Ron tries to Dianeticize Tony, but Tony uses his Personal Power and deflects L. Ron's attack with his titanic teeth. Good night, Old Mother Hubbard!"

 

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